Beer Goggles

There are two types of people walking the streets of New York City. Sub-types, sub-categories, exceptions and specifics are applicable, sure, but the overreaching idea here is just those two types. On one hand you have those mediocre, run-of-the-mill people who walk where they have to in order to get where they have to go. Not necessarily oblivious, but definitely not observant, they spend their travels looking through clear lenses with box-shaped blinders. They know the sky must be some shade of blue, the ground some shade of dirty or green, the streets and sidewalks either crowded or empty. There’s a certain warped respect that these people glean from others, partly for their apparent ability to think so clearly, but mostly for their ignorance of the ridiculousness around them – whether positive or negative.

Then we have those with tinted goggles – “beer goggles” if you will. They see the world in skewed shapes and non-existent colors; awed or disgusted by everything around them, much like your typical, drunken individual. The next patch of sidewalk is an even newer experience than the last, speeding taxis and people with big hats or weird jackets only adding to the novelty of a walk to the grocery store. The blinders on those uninfluenced are foreign to these people; there is no such thing as scope, nothing not worth observing.

I suppose the question is, which one are you? If you find yourself uninterested, well then you’ve answered it anyway and can go on with your day. If any of the above elicited a variation on the word “whoa”, the results of this mini-quiz should be just as obvious as pineapples. Not pleased with the answer? Just change your lenses.